Peter R. Kohli

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The Gentile Sandpipers to the rescue

Max in front and next to him are Timmy and Julia.

“Max!” shouted Timmy at the top of his little lungs as he raced across the sand and threw his wings around his best friend. Max for his part was somewhat embarrassed, but carefully wrapped his wings around Timmy as well. “I’m sorry for all the bad things I’ve ever said about you,” continued Timmy sounding as if he was about to cry.

Max took his wings from around his best friend and held him at a distance. “What are you talking about? You’ve never said anything bad about me.”

“I know, I know,” replied Timmy still overwhelmed by his friend’s presence. “But I’ve seen them say that in the movies and I thought it sounded cool. I hope you don’t mind.” What was Max to say, other than I understand.

Julia for her part was not given to shows of uncontrolled emotion and so she straightened her feathers which were a little rumpled after being held by two vicious looking seagulls, and walked over to Max. She extended her right wing and shook Max’s, “thank you, Max,” she said quietly.

“How did you know we were here?” asked Timmy looking at the devastation around him.

“Your sister Rosa,” he replied calmly, as he was well pleased by the damage he had caused resulting in his best friend and sister no longer at the mercy of the tyrannical seagulls.

“Why? How?” wondered Timmy a little surprised by Max ‘s reply. “Why, what is it that Rosa said or did?”

“Apparently,” answered Max, “when you and Julia were talking about going to Surf City and that you wanted to keep it a secret, she overheard you and then came to me and asked that I look over you and make sure nothing bad happens to either of you. Be their guardian angel she told me.”

Both Julia and Timmy were impressed with their sister. “Why didn’t she go to our parents?”

“Well,” replied Max walking over to a dead seagull and lifting its head to make sure it was truly dead, “Rosa likes keeping secrets and feeling important. Surely you know that about her?”

Julia shuddered as she watched Max lift the seagull’s head with his foot and watched it plop down on the sand when he removed it. “By the way,” said Max, “it was your idea that made all this possible.”

“What do you mean?” asked Julia.

“Well, the baking soda trick. I went home and told my dad about what you were doing, and it was he who decided that was a good idea. He took my mother’s icing gun and filled it with baking soda and then sprayed the seagulls that came to watch us fish.”

“And it worked?” asked Julia very proud of herself.

“Yes, it most certainly did. So, when Rosa came to me and told me that you guys were going to Surf City, I decided to fly above you and watch your steps. When I saw the seagulls surround you by Villa Capriani, I flew home and told my father. He gave me the spray gun but I wasn’t able to lift it. So, we put it in a small cart and the two of us pulled it along the sand, oh by the way sorry dad, I forgot to include you. Timmy, Julia, this is my dad, Max Senior., also known as Maximillian Schmidt.” The two sandpipers bowed their heads and thanked him profusely.

He looked slightly embarrassed. “Any friend of Max Junior’s is a friend of mine, and anyway when he told me what was going on, I had to help. Because don’t you have your festival tomorrow, your Christmas or something like that?”

Max Junior rolled his eyes, “dad you need to step out more often and mix with others than just Catholics. It’s the Jewish New Year.”

“That’s it!” replied Senior, “I knew it was like that, because it comes after your Christmas, doesn’t it?”

Max Junior rolled his eyes and Julia decided to intercede. “Well Mr Schmidt you could say that. Except we do things kind of backwards. Our New Year comes before our Christmas which is called Hanukkah.”

Mr Schmidt began to laugh, “of course. How silly. I should’ve realised that I’m sorry. It’s because Hebrew is written from right to left.”

Timmy thought his logic to be hilarious, while Julia smiled politely and Max Junior shook his head. “Anyway,” continued Senior, “I have to go back to my fishing because your mother is waiting for some fish for dinner. And you, Max, go with your Jewish friends and make sure they get what they need from the wherever it is they’re going.”

“Deli,” replied Junior.

“That’s right,” replied Senior, “I knew that. I’ll take the gun back with me.”

“How dad?” asked Junior.

“Oh, that’s right. I can’t. It’s too heavy to take all that way. I’ll tell you what, let’s leave it here as a warning for the others not to fool with us. Ok bye for now and oh yes, Happy New Year.” And with that, Senior began to race along the sand and then took flight.

“I hope you don’t mind me tagging along guys,” asked Max.

“No!” they both replied in unison.

“Love to have your company. I’m surprised that Rosa didn’t want to come along with you,” said Julia.

“She did, but I told her she needed to stay at home and tell her parents that the two of you have gone off on a little trip because you are having a surprise for them for dinner.”

“Oh, my goodness!” it was then that Julia realised what time it was. “We need to get a move on,” she panicked, “we have to be back home before sundown. Oh dear, how am I going to get there and back and cook dinner?”

Julia was really concerned that her little trip was going to turn into a disaster. “Calm down Sis,” replied Timmy, “Rosh Hashanah dinner isn’t until tomorrow night!”

Julia began to laugh. “Sorry, I was so frazzled. I forgot that the New Year isn’t until tomorrow night.”

“A more important question,” asked Max as they were making good progress and the sign for Surf City came into view, “are you buying stuff?”

“Yes,” replied Julia, “I have to get the ingredients to make the pastry to cover the gefilte fish.”

“What’s whatever fish?” asked Max still very proud of his accomplishments.

“It’s a Jewish thing,” replied Timmy not quite sure himself what it was.

“It’s a fish dish that I read about in the Jewish Cooking Monthly. It said that you can’t be Jewish if you don’t like gefilte fish,” explained Julia.

“I guess I won’t like it then.”

“You can try some Max,” replied Timmy a little out of breath when they stopped next to a store that had many people in it. “Can’t be the deli,” he replied, “next door I believe. Here we are. Chaim’s New York Deli,” read Timmy.

“But how are you going to get all this stuff home?” asked Max again. “I don’t think we can carry the stuff home with us.”

“Oh, you’re right!” said Timmy looking at his sister whose idea this all was.

“Uber!” she replied casually as she pushed open the door to Chaim’s New York Deli.

“Welcome!” said the Sandpiper wearing a kipah behind the counter, “welcome to the one and only Chaim’s New York Deli!”

Timothy stood there stunned.