Best-Selling Author & Writer

I pulled into what looked like the last parking spot in the grocery store car park without having to walk half a mile or so. I pulled out the grocery list from my pocket to glance at it before putting it back. It was a mental test I had developed for myself over past few the years and at which I must admit, I fail miserably.

As I was taking the keys out of the car in preparation of getting out and fighting the hordes in the food aisles, there was a series of sharp knocks on my window. I looked up to see a pint-sized man with sunglasses wrapped around his entire head staring at me. I lowered my window and before I could ask him why he was interrupting my preparation, he blurted out, “you’re parked illegally!”

Dear God, this is me, Rosa. Someone in my school told me I was being rude by talking with you. He said I shouldn’t do that and I should treat you with more respect. I told him you are my friend. Isn’t that right God? You are my friend? Can you hit him with some lightening, so he doesn’t pick on me anymore. Anyway, you’re a good boy, thank you and Amen and oh yes, sleep well.

“Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! wake up. I have to tell you something very important.” Rosa ran into the living room where her father was fast asleep in an armchair closest to a window, after a really hard day at work negotiating a new contract with the Teamsters. He needed to rest once he came home, instead of standing at the door as he normally did waiting for Rosa.  He had collapsed in the chair after giving Sybil a quick peck on the cheek.

Hi God, it's me Rosa. Sorry, I was being a naughty kid today, but I did not like my brother doing math with me cause he's very smart and he does not make math fun. My teacher said that in everything that must be done, there must be an element of fun, just like Mary Poppins. God, can you please make sure my daddy gets better sleep tonight because he was very tired and yawning. And, God please, make Julia stop making spicy food for dinner and one last thing, please, help me get oatmeal for breakfast. OK? I love you. You're a good boy and I'm proud of you. Amen.

“Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!” shouted Rosa as she ran towards her father who was waiting for her at the front door, colliding with him instead of jumping into his arms. George managed to stand his ground, though he was rather winded.

Dear God, it’s me Rosa once again. I am hoping you’re not getting tired of hearing from me. If you are, I can cut back talking to you to only two times a week. Please let me know in my dreams. Also please let me stay smart in school and when I tell my friends I want to be a cashier at Domino’s Pizza when I grow up that they stop laughing at me. Not everyone wants to be a doctor or a lawyer like my aunty Elizabeth. Please also make Elizabeth more girly and less like a man. I think that’s it for now. I’m tired and want to go to sleep. So, bye for now and oh yes, you’re a good boy, Amen.

Hello God, it’s me Rosa you’re favourite little girl. I want to thank you for another beautiful day. Do they have beautiful days on all the other planets you look after? Thank you for giving me my family and of course my wonderful daddy, but I have to also say my wonderful mummy because she told me I needed to. Thank you also for my bother Timmy and my sister Julia and especially Julia because otherwise my mummy would have to cook and then we would all die. I’d better go to sleep now because my mummy is looking at me. Ok God. Bye for now, I love you and oh yes, Amen.

Jeremy Steiger waited for the full moon. He was excited. He came home from work at the local birdseed mill in Surf City, where he is a foreman after stopping at Trader Joe’s.

Dear God, it’s me Rosa, your favourite little Blau. I just want to thank you for the summertime and making the weather cooler today. God, I need a few very important things from you. Please make Timmy an astronaut and Julia a chef. Also please help my Mummy feel better, because she’s not nice when she feels ill. She picks on my handsome Daddy. Anyway, you are a good boy, and I love you. Night, night. Amen.

Sybil woke up with a headache.

“Can I get you anything my dear?” asked George who felt he was pushed out of bed because he was drinking his coffee too noisily.